Cultural Death- Bargaining Stage

Here is a quote from Wikipedia to remind the reader what the bargaining stage is like:

Bargaining-
The third stage involves the hope that the individual can somehow postpone or delay death. Usually, the negotiation for an extended life is made with a higher power in exchange for a reformed lifestyle. Psychologically, the person is saying, "I understand I will die, but if I could just have more time...”

Example - "Just let me live to see my children graduate."; "I'll do anything for a few more years."; "I will give my life savings if..."

As a missionary passing through cultural death I passed through this stage. During the first term on the missions field this stage begins. Normal it starts between their second and third year, if they are on a four year schedule.

It starts because they realize that being angry will not change anything, and that they have no real power to change the culture as a whole. To a person from our fix everything American way, this is a bitter pill to swoll. The missionary begins to understand that if he continues to live in his host country he will be forced to endure cultural death. So he starts to bargain with God!

I remember doing this. I would say or think things like this: "God I know that you called me to Ghana, but if you change your mind that is fine with me!" "Lord, if I work really hard could you make Ghana have a coup, and I will promise to be a good pastor in the United States." "Lord, if you just allow me to make it to fulrough, I will find a place in America that has a large population of Ghananians, and I will start a ministry there with them", and even more, "Lord, if I serve you and start one church, could you have a college or mission board call me and ask me to work for them!" or "Lord, I will serve you very hard, please, just let me retire in the States!"

These are all real things that I prayed to God. I was bargaining with him, like a person in Ghana bargains with a food fender. People fear death (at least the unsaved do), but I know as a missionary cultural death is hard to. No one wants to die, and we will do anything to delay the inevitable.

I just have one thing to say about this stage. The Bible says in John 12:24 "Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone: but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit". The only way a person is truly not alone, is if they are willing to die to God's will.

As a missionary we are on the field, because God has called us to that location. Until be accept that and die to our own cultural world, we will remain alone. We will keep everything and everyone at a distance. But, if we die, the process can start, and God will give us fruit. Here is a promise that God gave me from His Word, when I passed through this time of bargaining.

Mark 10:29-30 And Jesus answered and said, Verily I say unto you, There is no man that hath left house, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my sake, and the gospel's, But he shall receive an hundredfold now in this time, houses, and brethren, and sisters, and mothers, and children, and lands, with persecutions; and in the world to come eternal life.

The great thing about being a missionary is that a person gets more: He has two homes, two countries, two famiies, two languages, two worlds!!!!!!!! We do not have less, we have so much more! I thank God for it all, and I feel that I am one of the most blessed people I know.